Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Sometimes I wish i did'nt have a brain..

Don 't ask me why sometimes I just wish that I will not think because i think too much and cause problems and I rather not think. Argh..
I don't know why im feeling like this. It's probably cause my menstrual cycle is on its way to CRUSH my mood again.
and YES! that's another thing i wish i did'nt have. I wish i don't have to go through this whole cycle of mood swings and shit.

My dad said don't let that take control of you, infact that's what all man say BUT i just can't help it you know!! It is so automatic in my body that when i have a period i have this random mood swings! gah!

One minute im happy, one minute im sad, one minute im throwing my tantrums.Tell me, do you think i enjoy feeling that way. HELL NO! like what my baby says i turn into monster when period is coming. i really don't know what to do about it. Well i've been trying to relax alot but my mind is all over the place worrying about things..

One of my biggest worries right now is that
1. How will poly be like
2. Will Kal and i even have time for each other when i start school again.

We hardly ever meet and he is never off on the weekends.. Drives me nuts to think I may not seem him in a week at all. Hell, even when im not schooling now i don't see him often if im lucky its what three times in a week if i'm not once but usually its just twice a week..
What if i start school??

How will get to see him.. once a month?!

Im sorry im being paranoid but seriously...
then again i think my PMS (incase you boys don't know, its called Pre menstrual syndrome)
is hightening the effect of my worries.

Im so tired atressing about stuff i think i need to meditate now, phone calls and talking about it is not working either..

Then again me bloging now is not working also.. because im still bloody worrying and wondering and thinking and feeling LIKE SHIT.. repeat feeling crummy.

Oh and.. Business management i forgot.. I have to study maths all voer again....
GREAT... just great...
and yes im being sarcastic. i really hate maths. I hope God blesses me with a good friend in poly to help me along with my rubbish non-mathematical brain of mine. so that i will be able to have at least a decent grade..

My brain is strictly like for.. Litreature, art, english, projects and stuff but seriously lay off the MATHS..

Chelsea+Maths=stress+ pimples= Ugly...

*Sorry people bear with my complains*

Oh, and guess what. i saw this horrible video clip of CHINA people!!! those bloody idiots skinning animals alive. those of you who think its funny I think your screws are lose up there..

Just think about your pet cat or dog or rabbit or hamster or whatever skinned alive beaten on the floor and shit.. I seriously hope someone stops this.. I was so incensed i wanted to write some note to the UN.. but obviously i dont think they'll read a silly old note from me because im just a "little girl" with "no clue what is happening"

Signed ferociously,
Chelsea